I stopped taking showers every day. I have stopped the religious scrubbing of my masculine body scent with the artificial chemical you call soap. Since then, my success with women has increased 400%. My intoxicating pheremones now fill the air around me, attracting women who long for a rugged, natural man.
It all happened by accident. I found out that I can gain an extra 15 minutes of sleep by skipping the morning shower. It’s not so much that I need an extra 15 minutes of sleep, but now instead of getting up at 8:45am I can get up at 9am, a number that pleases me psychologically. There is one major downside: in the morning it looks like there are small animals living in my hair. But by lunchtime it settles down once the grease starts kicking in. Many girls ask me what product I put in my hair when they are really just staring at scalp grease. (It really builds up in the middle, but that’s probably because I only use conditioner. Shampoo is for the devil).

I’m sure there was a time when humans accumulated dirt on their skin and hair, requiring a weekly bath in the village river that also doubled as the village sewage treatment plant. But these days I don’t even think many of you know what dirt looks like. Unless you’re talking summer heat wave, a daily shower is excessive.